Over the past few months, I've been coaching BigSend in everything from getting a mission to getting a girlfriend.

It started informally and I have to admit - I've really enjoyed it.

In my last post, I got an interesting response from a NYC PUA called "Bad Man".

He said:

Most guys who get involved in the "Pick Up Community" have clear goals at first.

They would like to get a girlfriend or get a hotter girlfriend. Some just want to feel comfortable in their skin when dealing with women. Maybe lose your virginity.

Universal stuff. Achievable stuff.

But somewhere those goals get left behind.

I loved BigSend's post about Guru's.

I've learned a ton from "Guru's" over the years but part of what I had to learn was to be my own "Guru" to reach MY GOALS.

I've also learned that support from friends is HUGE.

The online dating community is full of gurus.

Some of them will inspire your growth, some just want your validation and others just want your money.

I am no guru.

In Zen there is a concept of "taking a seat".

It means that to make progress on your spiritual path, you have to make a commitment to a teacher or philosophy and "take a seat" with them.

Students who wander from one teacher to another or one technique to another don't get very far.

It also applies to pickup.

Once you've picked a quality Pick Up School - Speed Seduction, Mystery Method, Swingcat etc. - it's time to commit.

Learn that method inside and out.

Field test everything. Be prepared to fight through the sticking points and plateaus you encounter along the way.

Squeeze every drop of value out of that method. Try everything - even the stuff that may make you feel uncomfortable - at least once or twice.