Last Friday I hung out with my new friend Ricky (that I met in my Men's Group Circle*) along with a few others. Like usual, we talked about Law of Attraction and how to manifest things into our lives. Without Ricky realizing the significance it had on me, he mentioned that affirmations are not about thoughts, but about beliefs.

Okay, so that seems obvious. Or, if not obvious it seems like some "whatever" point, but for me it was huge. I feel I definitely lost track of my thoughts and affirmations these last few weeks. They started to feel like a chore I had to say to myself once or twice a day, and after I said them I'd go on my merry way.

Almost out of the blue, I met a friend who studies interaction and dating but from an angle of affirmations and inner game. That is, my friend really emphasized using affirmations as a way to manifest what you desire in your life (not for positive thinking, but like “wishing from a genie” almost). Also by coincidence, Dante Valentine (from Rock star Casanova) mentioned he uses it actively for his ridiculous successes.

Somehow I got the inspiration to check out Okcupid again, a free myspace-ish dating site. I wouldn't categorize it as a Match or Singles site because there really is no pressure, no money involved, and people go on there to meet normal friends, activity partners. Their matching system finds you good friends as well as potential partners.

I used Match about a year ago and it didn't feel right. The girls felt a bit jaded so I shied away from it for a while.

So as school keeps taking over, I have less and less time to go out and socialize. I try to talk to girls on campus, but it is definitely forced. I don't naturally bump into attractive girls in my engineering classes or in the labs, ya know?

Inspired by a recent meditation, just 5 minutes ago, I decided to get the laptop and write. Daily I have been meditating and seeking to feel deep within my life force. That is what meditation means (to me), feeling my life force. Feeling my energy. Feeling my awe. Feeling my inspiration. Feeling my heart opening. Feeling my gut/solar plexus warming and simmering. Feeling my brain be spaced out---almost like on a drug but its all meditation. Also, feeling my emotions flow through my body freely. Feeling my sexual energy flow freely through my body.

My mental image of mediation, as far back as I can remember, was a half naked man sitting in the lotus posture with a super straight, stiff back and just sitting there. That is all. Whenever I'd try that type of mediation, it bored the fuck out of me. Like "omg.. im soooo bored" but it wasn't until recently I gained a new understanding of what mediation is. I can only speak my truth for what it currently is---I may change my "mind" later.

Lately I have been on an Ideagasms binge, absorbing Stephane's material, reading his boards. Asking questions related to women, ego, soul, happiness, truth. Quite a fantastic group. Though I am a bit shocked at some of the crazy shit that goes on there, the good out weighs the bad. So this brings me to speaking my truth.

I went out today with a PUA I met named TP as he was supposed to meet up with a girl and needed a wing. Unfortunately she couldn't show up or something didn't work out and we just ended up sarging. Now, I haven't gone out in two weeks. School is top priority and I had midterms spread out during that time.

So I am a bit socially rusty and needed to warm up a bit. TP gets into some sets and I just sit back and watch a bit. Later on we venue change to Saddle Ranch and meet up with Dante again. Dante is chilling because his student already extracted and he was planning to extract more girls too. So we end up getting into some sets together.

Life has an interesting path for me, that is for sure. To trace my journey very briefly, I was introduced into the dating advice community, weaseled around hit many bumps, found my spot and good friends, then somehow cross paths with Stephane from Ideagasms. Actually, I recall sending him an email a while ago asking for advice and he responded quite promptly. Me: "Where do I find well balanced girls" He relied "If you actually go out, perhaps you'll meet them" DUH, he knew me from that one sentence haha.